9.28.2008

SNL May Not Be What It Used To Be....

....but at least we still have these two doing things. After Amy leaves - it won't be funny at all.

9.26.2008

First time for everything...

The road called "Life" comes to a point where you need to decide which way you're going to go. I'm coming around the bend of that multi-toothed fork in my road and it's scary. First thing's first - I HAVE to finish that stupid grammar class...I just hate parts of speech and all of that fun stuff. I think part of me doesn't want to finish the class because after that, there is nothing holding me back from having to move forward and leap into the real world. That is the only thing I have to hold onto what has been my life for the past 8 years..... yes! I said EIGHT. My family says I have taught everyone of them a lesson in perseverance. I say I just couldn't make up my mind :) Although, I suppose there are many people out there who would have simply given up and quit until they decided what it was they wanted to study. I just figured I'd study everything until I found something I enjoyed.

Truth be told - I picked English/History simply because I wanted to get the hell out of UTPA! There were a plethora of times that I just wanted to quit going to school, but to me that wasn't an option. If I would have quit - all I would be in life was a cashier...and that wasn't going to fly with me. I finally had to quit working as a cashier back in April. I was going crazy - LITERALLY! I found myself standing there among a variety of people. They were either in high school or fresh out of, and were working to gain experience and to finally begin earning their own money. If they weren't kids - I was working with people over 30 or 40 years old who probably wouldn't be anything better. I'm not saying retail is a dead end job...some people make a great living working in retail, but it was not what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

I'd find myself pacing at Lowe's (especially when they stuck me at the self-checkout- I loathe that area! IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO CHECK YOURSELF OUT, GO TO A REGISTER!....Just sayin'.) and thinking to myself "you get paid too much to just stand around" and "I'd rather be doing something at a desk of my own, in front of a computer and making a difference than standing around with a bunch of kids and dealing with all of the bullshit that goes on among managers and slut employees". Seriously - if I didn't value myself and my body, I probably could have gotten far in that company because I know the managers weren't against doing things with employees. I simply stayed out of all of that drama and kept to myself, which in the long run makes it seem like you don't care about your job and you don't like being there...though, after a while - I didn't want to be there and started showing up late, or calling in.

The last straw came when I was at my most favorite register at Lowe's - the lumber register. People who go through the lumber area are 10x more pleasant than any other customers in the store. I had some training that I had to complete, so I took advantage of a slow period and went across to the Commercial Sales computer to knock out my training. Those computers had no headphones so I had to read the script of the training, rather than listen to a lecture. As I started this slide show training, I came across SO many spelling errors, and it REALLY pissed me off! I know I probably notice spelling errors more than most people, but COME ON! This wasn't some hole in the wall, mom n pop shop I was working for....this was LOWE'S......they've got locations all over the United States and they were talking about expanding into Canada and Mexico. By this time I had already chosen English as my major, but I didn't know what I wanted to do with my degree. But after taking this training - I just knew! I want to be the person that companies hire to look over these trainings, scripts, memos, projects, etc., etc., etc. for errors in spelling, grammar, word usage, punctuation.... There I was, working as a cashier for a company that needed someone at the corporate level to do something I do without giving it a thought. I had to quit. I decided that day that my dream job is to be so famous that I could stay at home and receive manuscripts, theses, books to be published, etc. in the mail to be proofread and edited. I'd be raking in the big bucks...but I have to start off somewhere. That's the question I now face, "Where do I start?" I wish the answer was obvious - but the answer I have right now - wherever I can. Having not worked since April means the bank account is empty. I can't start doing anything until I have money to back myself up - I just worry about the economy right now... are any companies going to be able to afford to pay me? When I was still working - companies were already finding ways to cut back on costs - firing people who needed to be promoted, and simply sliding someone in the same position over to a different department so that they didn't have to pay that person any more money, which only left hiring someone to fill a position that was $2/hr. cheaper.

I'm going to finish that class - because I can't just sit at home anymore. I need to do something with my life. I need to start standing on my own two feet. When I finish that class I'll probably feel better. I just hope to find a job ASAP.


Wish me luck...